Thinking of her

I think that the nights are the hardest... It's not that I miss her more at night, maybe it is where there is less to try and distract me?  I'm still not sleeping... my mind goes to those nights we stayed up late, laughing to The Nanny... I can't even find those shows on basic cable anymore!  At least after Dad passed, I could still watch shows we watched together - but Mom's shows do not come on the Hallmark channel at night anymore.


I feel a little more peace tonight than I have felt in a long time... maybe the shock is wearing off a bit?  Maybe I've just gone completely numb to it all... maybe its the meds I'm taking for this flare-up finally mixing in a good way with the meds I've been taking to keep me from completely breaking down emotionally and mentally?  


Here are a few of Mom's favorite moments from The Nanny... she used to tell me to make sure and wake her up when the episodes got to some of these parts..