Saturday, April 5, 2008

Myth of "Complete Honesty"


Everyone states they desire complete honesty, full disclosure, and no secrets. A total sharing of thoughts, needs, desires, feelings, and kinks; but does that include the negativity that, as humans, we all have from time to time? Is the One who demands "complete honesty" ready for the hurt, anger, doubts, and confusion that goes hand in hand with the positive aspects?

For a relationship as intimate and intense as extreme power exchange, honesty is mandatory. Otherwise, both people are playing a game. However, it takes time to develop the strength and trust in one another, with one another, before complete honesty can be revealed. How else can she learn to please Him if he is not honest about what DOES please Him? How else can he control her if she doesn’t open up entirely?

When the Master tells the slave to set up a place to be open about her thoughts ~ both good and bad using "complete honesty" ~ then He cannot hold her entries against her. However, whether they should be published so that the public can read them is up to Him. Some people use blogging or journaling as a place to express those thoughts, positive and negative, in a way that will not be held against the author later on. However, some see this as a form of written service which should reflect solely on the Owner of the writer, almost like a way to pay verbal homage to the Master. If this is the case, does this mean that He does not desire "complete honesty"? I would hope, in this case, that another method is in place to allow the slave to communicate all she needs too in a safe way, without fear of retaliation or punishment.

Take power exchange out of the scenario, as humans, can we handle complete honesty? Or must we always keep in mind the power of our words, their effects on others, and the consequences they can bring? Or does it become a form of manipulation?

Is complete honesty one sided? The Master may dictate His completely honest thoughts about the slave to the slave and she, in turn, must respond with her honest thoughts about herself... but never voice those of Him? If he is acting as a spoiled child and pitching a tantrum, is she not allowed to say such? Or is the fact that she even thinks that mean she is really not a slave but a discontented brat? I refuse to think that my entire need to serve and surrender to another can be canceled out because I question those who cannot control themselves. Anyone can control someone who is totally obedient, but how can he take control of another if he cannot control his own emotions? Or is that a question that requires too much honesty? Am I truly a selfish spoiled brat who wants to be coddled instead of dominated? Or do I just long for Someone who can not only stand toe-to-toe with me, but master me?

And who do we owe the truth to? For example, someone I consider a friend wrote about me in her journal. I fell asleep while on the phone with her Master and because of that, not only did I owe him an extreme apology but was a selfish lazy insincere bitch who used the words “relocatable slave” to get attention from dominant men, like some form of predator. Yes, falling asleep while talking to Him on the phone was a horribly rude thing to do. But when looking at the “complete truth” of it, I had already told him I had just came off an exhausting sixteen-hour shift, was beyond tired, and admitted that His voice relaxed me totally. It was also an hours worth of a one-sided conversation about how “disrespectful and horrible” his last ex-slave was, and I wasn’t allowed to say a word during it. Of course I fell asleep! But I apologized as soon as I realized it! However, he had already moved on to something else, a quote I had posted on my CM journal ~ which had nothing to do with him. Then again, I just answered my own question. The funny thing is that I had already told pixie that I had a ‘bad feeling’ because of how completely faultless he was for the last slave being released. Of course he finds no fault in Himself at all, and as His completely worshipping slave, she finds it in everyone else. It just ouched a little, because I had hoped she knew me better than that. Anyway, I wish her and Him the best of luck in the future.

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