Sometimes when I have be out of town and pull into the driveway, I will see his truck parked next to the house and think he is home. Finding his chair empty and the dark house chilly, I am reminded that he is gone. After seven months you would think I would stop looking for him...
The holidays weren't that bad, but the first few days of January have been really hard. I think about him everyday, but it seems that everyone else has moved on. We are using kerosene to heat again, that was always something he and I did together. Every evening when I drape a towel across the driver's side of the windshield to keep it from icing I think of him, of how I laughed watching him try and scrape the towel off the icy glass. I miss the way he kept his television so loud that it echoed in the rest of the house, the way he would smack his lips after he drank a cold glass of iced tea.
I hope Dad is having a wonderful birthday... I know he is happy, safe, and healthy... as much as I love him and miss him, I can't be selfish enough to wish for him back.
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