Emotionally demanding
I need a little bit of attention, damnit. Its not wrong to want a little attention in return for acts of submission. I am obeying His restriction of personal pleasure and I can't even get a response back from a message or an email or anything. Maybe He doesn't have time for me. Today is the fourth day again and not only do I need to have release, its making me pissy. Because I am fighting this all day long, I am constantly having to remind myself not to touch, not to rock that certain way, because He hasn't said I can. Well He hasn't said shit in a few days, I got a text message yesterday saying hello... the sad part is that it made my day.
Does He know what this feels like? How difficult it is for me to go four days without a release? Here I am, trying to contact Him, reaching out to Him and getting nothing in return. Yet, I can't bring myself to disobey Him and touch my own body. I know He has a lot going on, but I was as honest as possible with Him about how much attention I need and that I do need some time with Him.
I don't know what to trust... His words, or His lack of actions.
Does He know what this feels like? How difficult it is for me to go four days without a release? Here I am, trying to contact Him, reaching out to Him and getting nothing in return. Yet, I can't bring myself to disobey Him and touch my own body. I know He has a lot going on, but I was as honest as possible with Him about how much attention I need and that I do need some time with Him.
I don't know what to trust... His words, or His lack of actions.
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